"I am quite aware of what leading well looks like in the context of the military, but leading well at home—it just seems impossible," a soldier once said. As we delve deeper into the concept of leading well across different spheres of life, it becomes evident that one sphere may be well-trained and defined, while another might feel overwhelming and uncertain.
In the military, extensive training, continuous practice, and clear communication within the team build confidence and ensure effective leadership. Miscommunications are addressed and resolved quickly because the stakes are high, especially during wartime. This rigorous training and teamwork instill a sense of assurance and competence in military leadership.
However, leading well at home requires a different approach. It involves the same strengths, passions, and abilities but applied in a more nuanced and personal context. The lack of structured opportunities to refine and develop trust within the family can make this transition challenging. The skills that make one an effective leader in the military can also be instrumental at home, but they need to be adapted and consistently evaluated.
To lead well at home, one must reflect on their natural strengths, abilities, and the story they hold in their mind about leadership. Consider how these qualities can be applied to your marriage, parenting, and other family relationships. Do you and your spouse share similar leadership qualities? How can you balance independence with healthy interdependence?
Leading well involves envisioning the desired outcome, inviting others into the process, and working collaboratively to achieve it. Whether in the military or at home, focusing on strengthening your abilities and considering the needs of both spheres will lead to better leadership.
Ultimately, leading well means being present, open to learning, and committed to growth. By bridging the gap between different areas of your life and applying your leadership skills with intention and empathy, you can create a supportive and nurturing environment for both your team and your family.
Emma Martin
Call to Action:
As we observe Men's Mental Health Awareness Month, let's take the time to reflect on how we can lead well in all areas of our lives. Share your thoughts, experiences, and strategies for effective leadership at home and in the military.
Together, we can support each other in becoming better leaders and improving our overall well-being.
Question to consider.
What story and image are driving how you show up as a leader?
When a man doesn't feel a sense of value or worth, lacks confidence in his skills to add value, and experiences fear when it comes to leading, asking the following questions can help initiate a conversation and provide support:
What specific areas or aspects of your life make you doubt your value or worth? How do these thoughts impact your overall well-being?
Can you identify any past experiences or influences that may have contributed to your current perception of yourself? How might reframing those experiences help you recognize your value?
What are some skills or talents you possess, even if you may not be fully aware of them? How can you explore and develop these skills further?
In what ways do you believe your unique qualities and experiences can contribute to the success of a team or organization? How can you leverage these strengths to make a positive impact?
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